Nic Fix

It was 10:30 last night, an hour past the time when I should have been cruising the asphalt on my way to home sweet home, and I was at the nurses station charting.

A faint whiff of cigarette smell came to my nose, but this was not unusual because one of the night staffperson is a heavy smoker. She must have just walked past me after her fix.

Then the smell got a little stronger, and I noticed the resident smoker was nowhere in sight.

One of our particularly spastic nurses leapt out of her chair like it was scorching her cheeks and shrieked, "Who's smoking!"

Three more nurses got up, and with the seriousness of a manhunt they went to find the offender.

30 seconds later they found a patient with an impish grin, sitting on a toilet with a smoldering cigarette butt in her hand, in utter nicotine bliss.

Good thing they found her quickly. If the smoke alarm is activated, the Fire Department would have charged $3,000 to respond.